Praise to Him!

When I  was younger I heard somewhere “Love is not a feeling, it’s a choice.” And it sounded horribly unromantic and left me despondent about love. As I’ve grown older I’ve come to understand and accept that love is a choice. Making it even better than the romantic idea we have. When it’s a choice we choose te person we want to be with, we cannot blame it on whatever else when it goes wrong, it is our own choice. And therefore we know someone also chooses us. This means that, in the hard times, when there is not necessarily romantic love, or the inherent wanting to give everything up for someone, we know that we need to perservere because it is a choice. We need to keep giving of ourselves, we need to be quick to listen and slow to anger, we need to hope and trust and forgive. Because this is what love is, according to the bible.

Understanding love as a choice has freed me a lot. It freed me from thinking that I can only fall in love with “hot” guys and also knowing that these feelings are usually just hormones and I can consciously work out with my mind whether this is a good match or a person I can see myself being in a marriage with. It also means that when times are hard I know we will both keep fighting, because we will not just say “oh the feeling is gone” and then leave. We are there in good times and bad. This is what I hope for myself one day and I pray to God that He keeps giving me clarity in these things.

So love being a choice means we do not walk out when it gets hard. We do not give up. We do not blame the other person. We perservere. We do something to fix the problem, we do not just wait to feel in a forgiving mood and then go and apologise. I have loved someone badly recently and this is what I regret most, being self-seeking and not God-seekingi n how I handled everything. Acting on feelings instead of what I know to be right before God.

Anyway, that’s beside the point. Yesterday it dawned on me that, if love is a choice, and if God chose marriage to be a reflection of His relationship with his bride, the church (ie. me) then my love for Him is a choice. I need to choose to keep loving Him every day. Even if I experience His promises as dissapointing, even if Iam despondent and feel depressed and I dont have that feeling of “love” for God, I need to keep loving Him. And loving Him means doing His will, keeping His way. If my relationship with God is to work, then I need to choose to to believe that God is just, God has a plan for my life, God is good and God is loving and caring and all of that, even though I cannot see immediate evidence of that and even though my plans do not work out. In the same way we need to believe that whoever we are in a relationship with is good, we need to trust in their character and know that their intentions for us is good as well. And if we interpret it from this side, believing God is good, we will look for evidence of His goodness, instead of His rejection and lack of intervention.

There is still a lot more to say about this, but the point is that pain and suffering is no excuse to abandon our love for God. It is okay to have questions, but involve Him in the answering thereof. And we have no excuse not to do His will. We need to die to ourselves more and more every day, we need to help others, we need to praise and thank Him. No matter how we FEEL at the moment. I have at times felt so close and thankful to God and at others barely believed in His existence. And I think that, praising God in the hard times, means more to Him that praising Him when we are well. Hoping and trusting in Him when we have no evidence of Him in our lives or in the world, means more than believing Him when we are staring at a beautiful sunset. We need to praise Him in death and in life. In hardship and in blessing. In everything.

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3 Responses to “Praise to Him!”


  1. 1 Petra Maart 26, 2010 om 4:40 nm

    Karlien, jy skryf great goed! Hoe gaan dit met jou? Watter werk doen jy? Jy moet laat weet sodra jy ‘n plekkie het dat ek kan kom kuier. Wanneer jy niks het om te doen nie email my petracolsby@gmail.com

  2. 2 Carakind Maart 29, 2010 om 11:34 nm

    Karlien, hoe kuier ons heerlik met jou en jy lyk fine en meanwhile gaan jy deur hierdie goed??

    Wel, dankie in elk geval vir gister… was baie lekker.

    Jy het inderdaad vrek baie wysheid. Jy weet jys awesome, ne? Net weer ‘n reminder. Jy’s awesome. Baie sterkte… en geniet die huis.

    Jy’s op vandag se WordPress Hot Blogs (way to go)

  3. 3 karliendupreez Maart 30, 2010 om 6:39 vm

    Thanks Care! Jou moeder en sussie weet, maar ek en jy het mekaar te min alleen gesien om die hele ding te vertel. Was lekker om gedistract the word though want as ek nie tussen mense is nie is dit flippen heeltyd op my gedagtes. So thanks vir die distraction partytjie:-)


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