The illusion of choice

“Thanks for your help” he said, while I tried to re-arrange the bundle in my arms “My friends are almost here so I gotta go” placing the bundle in his arms in mine. I tried to steady myself against the sudden extra load. He barely seemed to notice.

“Here are your shoes” I said.

“I can get them from you later” he replied, already turning the other way.

“No” I kicked them off, “my battery is almost flat I don’t know if I’ll see you later. Take them now”

I turned without looking back. When I got back to my tent I threw the things on the ground and took my cellphone out of my pocket, turning it off.

Could love be more irrelevant?

I wonder about a time when I thought walking away was easy and love would fade. I wonder about the illusion of choice and how long I would stay away this time. I wonder if he’d even notice.


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